Nutritionist:
- Consume more cinnamon, it helps you lose weight!
Me at the pastry shop:
- 10 cinnamon donuts, please!

At an anthropology museum in China there were 1000 skulls. The guide explains:
- They ate poisoned mushrooms and died.
- But some skulls have holes!, observes one of the tourists.
- Some didn't want to eat...

In psychology class, the teacher explains:
- The best way to save a woman from depression is sex.
A student asks:
- Professor, but how can you bring a woman to depression?

- Do you like the tie I got you for Christmas? What do you think would suit it?
- A big beard to hide it!

A policeman stops a speeding driver:
- You know, I had a premonition that I was going to issue a fine today. That's why I waited for you here all day.
- Well... I came as fast as I could.

Talk between 2 mosquitoes, father and son:
- How's your first flight, son?
- Wonderful father, everyone applauds me!

- There might be a storm at night, says the husband.
- If you come home early, it won't be...

A guy is arrested and taken to the police station because he claimed to sell people the elixir of immortality.
At the station, the police found out that the individual is also a recidivist, having been arrested for the same reason in 1620, 1754, 1836, 1928 and 2002...

Mom, dad why is he bald?
- Hairless people are smarter.
But why do you have so much hair on your head?
- Shut up and eat!

Two guys in prison:
- How old did they give you?
- 10...
- For what?
- I broke a window at work.
- Just for that? Where do you work?
- On a submarine...